All Around the World
by Karmagirl880618
Summary: This is what I thought should have happened at the end of The Farmer. The ending was good for TV but as a fan I needed more.


_**A/N: This is my first time posting something in this particular fandom but I love Haven. It's one of my favorite shows. This season has just been chocked full of inspiration. This is what I feel like should have happened between Audrey and Duke at the end of The Farmer. Eric Balfour acted the end out perfectly but my inner fan wrote them some dialogue. I hope you guys like it. Be gentle with me. All Around the World is a song by James Morrison. I don't own the song, the artist, or anything belonging to Haven.**_

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_**"**So the road's to hard to see. It's like we got our eyes closed. I don't know where it leads. I guess we don't want to know. And we play these silly games, but I don't want to play no more. Yes I know to the sky. Holding my hand, wipe the tears from your eyes..."_

It took everything she had to make herself walk into the Gull. Normally, it was a safe place for her. She could go in, Duke would make her laugh, and then her day wouldn't seem so bad. That wasn't the case today. Now she was just waiting for another kick in the teeth. She was almost done, it wouldn't matter how much pain she was in soon. She was going to disappear, drift off to God-knows-where, so she could handle whatever he had to say to her. She knew what kind of bitch she was being but this was for the best.

When she walked in she hated herself even more than she had before. Duke was at the bar hunched over a tumbler of what appeared to be scotch staring into its depths as though it could take all the pain away. Eventually, probably while staring down at her own tumbler full of liquor, she was going to have to deal with the cold feeling surrounding her these days. Knowing that the position her friend was in was her fault just made her feel worse but she wasn't going to show it. Project Clean Break was still a go.

"Can I get one of those?" He did exactly what she expected him to do after what she did to him. He ignored her and poured himself another drink. Nodding to herself, she took a deep breath and climbed onto the bar stool next to him. "Got some good news, everyone Nix attacked made a full recovery. But you already know that. Duke, what happened out there?" Instead of answering he stared at her with haunted eyes full of tears before standing up and heading for the door. Audrey jumped up and put herself between him and the door fighting not to flinch under his glare. He'd never looked at her like that before.

"Move." He commanded quietly but Audrey stood her ground. "I can't be around you right now." He said with a voice full of resignation.

"Why?"

"Because you really won't like me if I stay. I'm not going to be a gentleman right now. You want a gentleman, go find Nathan." Audrey decided not to mention why that wasn't possible.

"You need to yell, yell. What happened out there?"

"I walked away fully intending to leave you to clean up the mess all by yourself until I saw that kid. I couldn't help wondering how long it would take for people to look at him the way they look at me. Like they're waiting for me to turn into the monster they expect me to be. I gave you that full speech about making my own choices and choosing my own fate and then you ask me to kill someone. How long would that kid have lasted before the last person he trusted turned on him?" everything he said was like a physical blow, those probably would have been easier to take. Still Audrey stood her ground, he needed to get this out of his system. And she would take it, it was the very least she could do at this point.

"Look, I know how hard that decision was for you to make and I'm sorry."

"Well, that makes it all better. I'm officially unbothered by the monster I'm probably turning into. Thanks for that." He replied turning away from her as he ran his hands through his hair.

"But there were so many kids who would have done horrible things before dying painful slow deaths. The ends justified the means."

"You know, out of all the people in this town, you were the last person I expected to ask me to do that. And I honestly wish I could say I did it for babies everywhere. But that damn kid, he had to see the worse part of his father and then no matter what he did, people were going to look at him thinking it's just a matter of time. They would wait for him to be a monster just like his bastard of a father. I know what that feels like and I don't wish it on my worst enemy." He wasn't looking at her as he spoke. He was staring out the window the same way he had stared into his cup.

"You aren't a monster." He made a noise somewhere between a snort and something that meant he disagreed.

"You are my best friend, you know that." He said turning around to look at her finally. When he did she seriously wanted him to look away again. There was so much weight in the look he was giving her it broke her heart. "Hell, I think you're my only friend in Haven. Everyone else in Haven subscribes to the Wournos way of thinking, they think that eventually I'll show my true colors and kill you simply because my asshole father told me to. It's funny how they all neglect to remember that I hated the bastard when he was alive. Everyone except you, Audrey. All this time I thought you knew that I didn't want to be anything like him, I thought my best friend understood." As he was talking he moved closer to her. By the end he was towering over her forcing her to back up until her back met the bar.

"I do…" She began but he held up his hand to stop her.

"But then something occurred to me and it pissed me off because I really just want to blame all this on you and feel better. You just got what to you feels like a terminal diagnosis. This is you, giving up. The last thing you want is to hurt the people you care about. The only reason you would go kamikaze on all of your relationships would be a misguided attempt to protect us from what happens in 43 days. do you really think that doing something stupid now is going to get us to just let you go?"

"You don't understand." Audrey replied weakly reaching up to wipe tears off her face.

"I understand perfectly. The Audrey I know wouldn't give up this easily. She's the same girl that got kidnapped and by the time help finally arrived she was well on her way to saving herself. That girl has had a lot on her shoulders for a long time but she never backed down and she never gave up. I know you must be tired, Audrey, but man up. I may not like you very much right now but I love you. So I'm going to find a way to save you, whether you like it or not. Because you're my best friend and that's what best friends do. They tell you when you're being an idiot and remind you of who you are when you start to forget. Most of all, they forgive you when you royally fuck up. For some reason you don't think you're worth saving, but Nathan and I know you are. So when you're done pushing everyone away and feeling sorry for yourself we'll be here trying to come up with a plan." Instead of yelling at her he was staring down at her with compassion mixed in with his anger. He used his thumbs to wipe tears off her face before he backed away to head for the door again. Before he got far Audrey reached out and grabbed his hand to stop him.

"What if I can't be saved? What if trying to save me gets you both killed? I can't let you do that."

"There you go again, making decisions that aren't yours to make. I don't know about Nathan, but I'm a grown man capable of thinking for myself. Contrary to what you think, you don't control me. If I decide to save you or die trying, that's my decision to make. You are the only person in this town who would miss me if I was gone. That's worth fighting for." Audrey was shaking her head the moment he mentioned dying. When he tried to move away again she grabbed him and pushed him against the bar. He looked pissed but he just raises his hands in surrender.

"I don't actually know who I am and I don't have any memories to tell me about my past. But the memories I do have are horrible lonely. I never has a home until I got here. I never had friends to protect or a family to pick up the pieces when I fell apart. My biggest fear, one that I had to live through not to long ago, is having to watch you and Nathan die with no power to stop it." She felt more tears falling down her face but she made no move to stop them. She just held onto his shirt and let him see it all. "I have never loved anyone the way I love the two of you. The man Lucy loved got killed and there was nothing she could do about it. If I lose either of you, disappearing won't matter because it will kill me. Please don't do something stupid." She said stepping away. He snorted behind her and she turned around just in time to see the fire re-ignite in his eyes.

"Afford me the same courtesy!" He snapped finally. Audrey flinched, it was the first time he'd raised his voice since they started talking. He advanced on her, taking long powerful strides as she backed up till she hit the bar. "Everyone in this town thinks I'm nothing but a criminal. You are all I have here. It's unbelievably noble and selfless of you to continuously fall on your sword the way you do. Have you ever stopped to think that what we really need you to do is live?"

"I don't think I have that option." The sentence got a reaction. He moved faster than she thought he could boxing her in against the bar. He bent so he was eye level with her and Audrey had to fight not to look away.

"Is that what you tell yourself to make it easier to just give up? At this point you're just letting it happen. I'm waiting for the Audrey I know to make an appearance. I know you know how to fight back. So fight back already. Get angry, get pissed! Stop with this turn the other cheek bull shit and stop bending over." Why didn't they understand that there was nothing she could do? She didn't have a choice. No one asked her if she wanted this, it was forced on her. No matter how hard she tried to hold her emotions in there was just no more room.

"What is there to fight?!" she hollered shoving him back. "Don't you think that I would go down swinging if there was actually something to hit? I can't shoot a fucking meteor shower! All I can do is wait. All this time they knew and they let me run around like I had all the time in the world. I finally let myself… I've been a God damn puppet since I got here, and no matter how hard I try I can't cut the strings! So you tell me. What am I supposed to do? How do I fight fate?" by that point she had all but dissolved into sobs. She cried for what she asked Duke to do, she cried for the memories she didn't have and the life she never got to live. She cried for Nathan and everything they had been through. As mad as he was, Duke still pulled her into his arms and let her cry on his shoulder. "I don't know how to fight this. Why can't I fight this?" she sobbed into his chest with her fists balled up in his shirt.

"There's my Audrey." He said quietly rubbing her back while she sobbed. A while later they were sitting on the floor sharing the bottle of scotch silently. Audrey was all cried out; she didn't want to feel her feelings anymore. She wanted to go back to being numb. Duke got up and came back with another bottle.

"You're not a monster, Duke." She said grabbing his hand so he couldn't get away. "A monster wouldn't cry over the death of a killer, even if it was by his own hand. Taking a life isn't supposed to be easy. It hurts and you feel guilty. It's what you're supposed to feel." She could see his jaw working as he tried to control his emotions. She pulled his arm to get him to look at her and it broke her heart when he did. "I'm sorry I put this weight on your shoulders. I truly wish there had been another way. But you were right; it wasn't my decision to make. I do trust you, Duke. That never changed. You have every right to be pissed at me or to hate me. But you're not a monster and I will do everything in my power for as long as I can to make sure you stay that way." A ghost of a watery smile touched the smugglers face as he handed her the bottle.

"And I'll be damned if I let someone take you away from me without a fight."

**_"_**_Yes, we can try. Don't lose hope until the loves gone. And all around the world, there is hope until the loves gone..."_

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_**A/N: I hope you liked it. It's really not my best work but I re-wrote it a few times before I finally decided to just post it. Let me know if you want a part 2. Reviews make me happy.**  
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